Archives For Personal Development

Hard Work Update 4/1/12

April 1, 2012 — 5 Comments

Things got a bit turned around between the last Hard Work update and this update. I was coaching for Pursuing Your Calling with Brent Green and Cindy Hirch and Brent’s life started changing in awesome ways. These changes made him decide  to pull back from the coaching so he could focus the more important changes to his life. This made me start asking what I was doing with my time. After digging in, I realized I need to give Andrea more of my time. I have almost pulled back on everything I was doing.

The next 3 bullet points were my goals at the last update

  • Developing a product for Pursuing Your Calling to that relates to couples getting on the same page.
  • Developing a new/free/better goal setting worksheet.
  • Figuring out another product to develop.

I did not complete any of these but I finally completed my product. This was hard for me because I was fighting my lizard brain which was afraid to put itself out there.

Photo Credit: henrymaxm

The next three months is going to be the hardest for me. My goal is to do a lot of nothin’. Actually, my goal is to spend time with Andrea and spend time thinking about what I want to do next (i.e. where to take the site, how to grow this as a business, etc.). This is extremely hard for me since I am hard wired to take action and complete things. I know spending time with Andrea is reaching a goal but it is not as clear cut as other goals. It is easy to tell when I lose 5 lbs or I make $10 but it is hard to quantify “spend more time with Andrea”. This is especially hard for me since much of the time will just be sitting with her. I am an active person and it will be hard for me to do more sitting.

Nevertheless, I think this will be really good for me. I need to learn to let go of a lot of things and learn moderation and this may be the first step down that path.

Taking a Nap While in Germany

Over the last few years I have been growing an interist in learning new languages. I think it comes from my interest in building new relationships and I cannot do that as effectively when interacting with people who speak a differnt language. I have tried a few tools, and I am always looking for better ways to learn language.

I choose  learn languages which I can use in the near future. It gives me a deadline and a great motivation to push through. Also, my goal is to interact in the language as fast as possible since using it will accelerate my learning better than a class or program.

I have tried school, free podcasts, Rosetta Stone, and Pimsleur.

In high school I had three years of Spanish. At that time I was not nearly as interested in language learning. We were taught in a method similar how we learn proper English in school. Start with the alphabet, learn words, learn the proper way to structure sentences, etc. We were never tested to interact with native speakers which crippled my ability to use it in the real world. I still retain some of it but not enough to do anything  productive.

I next tried to learn French in 2009 so I could interact with our French vendors while working on a project.

I started with free podcasts but they  were too slow and did not give me enough in-depth information. I guess I get what I pay for.

Next, I purchased the first three levels of French by Rosetta Stone. I studied it every night. After about 3 months I had not even completed the first level. I knew some basic words in French but not enough to talk.

A couple of things that Rosetta Stone has is the ability to check your pronunciation and and to see the words written.

Last Fall I was going to Germany and I wanted to be able to interact with people. After doing some research on learning language faster I purchased Pimsleur. I listened to only 30 lessons in my car to and from work for 3 months.

I liked this method because I did not have to sit in front of a computer and I could do it with out taking other time out of my day. Plus I learned significantly more compared to the time put in compared to the other methods.

I was able to speak basic phrases and ask for things in German. I have repeatedly had some Germans compliment me on my pronunciation.

This method teaches you a phrase and then modifies the words slightly to create a new phrase. It builds on itself, and when I use it in the real world I learn more.

Over the next few months I am going to be studying the total Pimsleur package for Spanish. The nice thing about this is that I can practice on a regular basis with such a strong Spanish speaking population in the US.

If you are interested in learning a language I recommend Pimsleur over Rosetta Stone.

Update: I have just started Studying Spanish using Pimsleur. I know it works since I am trying to answer the Spanish in German (it shows me the German last August stuck). Also, they have upgraded the program to include computer learning and reading. I still just use the audio in the car and try to move to actually speaking with someone as fast as possible.

Photo Credit: Jamesongravity

Things are getting complicated. We have to rely on experts more now then before, and the need of people with specialized knowledge is growing. For example, it used to be that teenagers worked on their cars, but now they are so complicated that an expert technician is needed to do most of the work.

Don’t get me wrong, the world is better, but we have to learn to deal with the increasing levels of complication.

I have noticed that people are relying on experts for every little thing. Also, the definition of expert is becoming more broad which includes someone with an opinion who is willing to speak up.

There are some things that require experts such as my car, but for many things we need to decide, on our own, if it it passes the common sense test. It simply means to ask yourself it that piece of information makes sense. Don’t disregard it if it does not, but don’t blindly accept it.

For instance, I had a physical a few years ago and I noticed my creatinine levels were above normal. I asked the nurse why, assuming she was more of an expert than me. Her first answer was that I do not drink enough water. I am a total nerd so I had been tracking my water intake; I was drinking 1.5-2 gallons a day. When I told her this she said that I was drinking too much soda (or pop if your prefer). I followed this up by informing her that I had not drank a soda in 3 months. At that point she was pretty much lost.

You have to be willing to push back on the experts if something does not feel right. Don’t take things for face value.

I have a friend who took her newborn son to the doctor. Her son had a minor problem and she asked the doctor to explain it. The doctor said it was too complicated to explain. Her response was “I have a PhD in engineering, let’s try”. He did not like this.

Be willing to make your expert explain themselves to you.  Many experts hate to be questioned but you have to do it.

 

 

 

 

 

How to Stay Positive

March 4, 2012 — 2 Comments

Photo Credit: SanFranAnnie

I am generally a very positive person but it takes work. It is easy to stay positive when everything is going well but when things go bad is a different story.

One technique I use is to consider everything a learning experience. When something goes bad and I start to get upset I ask myself ”what did I learn from this?”.

Not only do I learn from the situation but it pulls me out of the emotional side of things, and turns on my thinking brain which allows me to see the situation from the outside.

Get Rid of One Thing

March 2, 2012 — 3 Comments

Photo Credit: Sean MacEntee

Over the years I have been accumulating things. When I left school to move to Tennessee and when I left Tennessee to move back to Missouri a moving company took care of everything. It was so easy.

About a year ago we had to move our own stuff. I decided we have too much crap. While having to lift all of the stuff we own I started asking why we have so much stuff which we don’t use.

I thought that was dumb so I set a goal to get rid of one thing a week. It is a simple plan, but it works. Not only are we getting rid of stuff we do not need, we are opening up space in our house, reducing the stuff that has to be cleaned/dusted, and reducing the clutter.

Some things I sell on Craig’s list, some things go to Goodwill, some things I scan to electronic form, and some things just go in the trash.

One of the unintended consequences is that we spend less money and buy less stuff. Now that we know we have to get rid of things we am more aware of what we purchase.

You should try this. Are you willing to get rid of one thing a week?